Dear Stomach, You're Ruining My LIFE

Dear Stomach, 

Please stop. Your persistent nagging and painful reminders that all is NOT well, have gotten through. I get it, I'm working on it but in the meantime do you think it possible you can back off, even just a little?

Sincerely,
Me

These days I'm living off the five Ps: 

1. Probiotics
2. Prilozac
3. Pineaple Juice
4. Pickles
5. Pepto

Now add to that list a prescription for the nausea and some other stuff I really don't want to talk about.

I've been dealing with some major stomach issues lately that have taken a toll on me. I can't eat (those who know me, know I really do love to eat), I constantly feel sick and as if I'm on the verge of vomitting, the pain radiates to my back leaving golf ball sized knots and to my neck, this gives me a headache for which I have to take medicine which just makes my stomach hurt worse. 
I haven't been able to go to the gym in over two weeks as that just seems to make the pain worse (I miss Zumba) and I love the gym, it makes me feel good about myself. And the exhaustion, I feel exhausted ALL THE TIME! 

The worst part has been that I'm in a foul mood almost every day. Seriously, like I will bite someone's head off any minute and that scares the hell out of me. Jarrad has been great. He checks on me daily, does extra at the house because he knows a messy house drives me nuts but I just don't have the energy to do anything about it, when I have a good day, he tells me all day long how glad he is that it's a good day and here I am, feeling like I may snap any minute and for what? Because, he's doing more around the house? Because he's genuinely concerned? Wow, what a bitch I would be if I acted on that impulse and Saturday I did. Saturday Jarrad was napping in the bedroom with Sarge and me on the couch with the other pups and Sarge started scratching to be let out. In my vicious state, I told myself Jarrad was ignoring Sarge so I'd be the one to get up and let him out so after 30 minutes, I stomp in the room, let Sarge out, bark at Jarrad and slam the door. WTF?!! He didn't deserve that and of course that put him in a bad mood (how could he not?).

What scares me the most, I think, is not only not knowing but I have this huge fear that I'll have test after test after test run and they'll still find nothing. I'm tired of it, I'm done and I'm doing something about it because the last three months have proven to me that this time, it's not getting better. It's just getting worse. 


Please say a little prayer that the Dr.'s will figure something out VERY soon.I don't want to be a horrible wife, I don't want a negative attitude, I don't want to be in a perpetual state of sickness for the rest of my life. I'm active and I was to remain that way. 


OK, that's my vent for the day. Sorry to be whinny but I had to get it out. Now, what can I do for my husband as a little thank you for being amazing?